08.15 Over the past few days I have been trying to put myself in the position of the early human beings who worked out how to create fire, how to fish, how to kill animals and discard the harmful components, how to eat and then cook the things that grew out of the ground which they were also able to distinguish from those which made them sick and which made some die.
I also wondered about the human beings who in different places and at different times first decided it would be good to draw and paint and tell stories or make objects, or sing or make noises, or move their bodies. What made one human do one thing from another? Was the first impulse emotional? How much thought went into the first actions.
I also wondered about those first human beings who looked up at the falling rain or snow and wondered what it was, or speculated about the force that blew at different speeds and could move the clouds in the sky, and why it became light and became dark, or of that the first individual, perhaps in a cave, alone and afraid who thought about death as well as about life.
Such beings were the first human creatives, the first artists, the first teachers and first spiritual guides. They also had to hunt and fish, find shelter and warmth and know how to defend themselves, their mates, their children and their parents when they aged and could not longer hunt and fish and make shelter for themselves.
At various times in various places a community was formed of sufficient size and organisation that it was possible for individual human beings to contribute to their society as creatives, artists, writers, thinkers and teachers, and such like. It can be argued that the division of labour was necessary for society to progress as it was for each skill to develop techniques and methods, a body of knowledge first based on experience and then on written record, and to develop its own language and then systems for testing the knowledge and the skill, awarding competence, and rewarding exceptional ability. Sometimes I wonder if such a division was a good thing and that that we have lost more than we have gained when we lose the capacity to provide food, provide shelter, provide entertainment and provide for our owns security and those of others close to us. But whether it was good or bad, it has happened and for most people and for the most part it is necessary to adapt and accept change if we are to survive.
The function of those who draw, paint, write, who create objects, create and perform music, dance and drama has and remains varied: for pleasure and entertainment of oneself and others, to celebrate, venerate and pay tribute to the physical environment, the metaphysical, the supernatural and the spiritual, to show appreciation, respect and feeling for one or more others, or question and challenge aspects of the human beings, individually and collectively and over time the activity has been generated to create personal wealth, power and status. The emphasis or priority given by the creators has and will continue to vary and enables those who wish to examine the work of previous generations to learn something of the nature of the society and of the position of creativity within that society.
It appears to me that there have always been those creatives who become recognised, become fashionable, become rewarded for their work while other will be mocked, or ignored or make others angry or afraid, and they and their work is rejected, banished and even destroyed and that this will always be so.
To-day the position has only changed in one significant respect in that we can sit in our modern caves and with comparatively small amounts of trading goods we can experience something of the creations that are known to have existed and are continuing to be created from the commencement of time on planet earth and we can communicate with those who are creating, who are collecting, conserving and curating, who are thinking and teaching, who are learning or just enjoying and experiencing and sharing, and we can communicate anywhere and anytime in the known world, and perhaps presently unknown to us to other beings beyond.
Having expressed my own regret at not being able to hunt and fish, raise animals and grow crop, build my shelter, and suck like I also believe it is a good thing that when an individual human being shows a desire and an aptitude in some activity they are provided with all the help and the knowledge to enable them to satisfy themselves and those others interested in that activity, and that for this we have created teachers and tutors, schools, colleges and universities, and in order to differentiate between levels of activity and ability we devise tests to find out what has been learnt and what individuals can do and that as a consequence assign them roles, and in some instance give them full time or part work in the activity in question.
You do not have to go through these formal processes and structures to engage in the activity or excel at it, unless you live in a society which requires to do so, but in general the formal system of education, training and the management of practice has led to the creation of things we all value and which have stood the test of time.
However as I mentioned recently in relation to something else it is also fact that some creatives are different and special and contribute to society disproportionately to the majority of others, even if those others have also been educated and trained and have become experienced
For my part I came to what I do now and what I think and say about it, differently from those who are presently recognised as the experts in the doing, evaluating, collecting and showing and had I been younger, or wanted to do something different, I would have followed the available routes to learn, to be tested, rated and certificated. I would have done this not because I need to, but because like every mountain, desert, ocean bed, deep forest or glacial wilderness because it is there. I would also like to see more of what there is to see and to experience at first hand instead of through relayed pictures and sounds
I am confident, however, that given my experience of life beforehand I would not have arrived at different conclusions about what I need to do, how I need to do it, what I hope to achieve, or what I think and feel about the work of others.
I am a creative who needs and wants and has the means to create. I also used be someone who set out to intentionally influence, but no longer, for reasons, some private and some which can be made public. I have always had, and I still have the drive and the patience to complete what I am involved with on the basis of what I or others decided should be the desired outcome, or to adapt or significantly change, and even abandon projects according to priorities and circumstances.
It does not matter to me or affect what I think, believe say or do that some individuals create one thing in one way and then spend the rest of their time reproducing the thing in the same way or differently, whether they make no money, sufficient to live on money, or rich money beyond need to continue doing what they want and are able to do, whether they are recognised by the their peers or the rest of the world or not if they give what they do.
I have formed the opinion that art becomes historical the moment it ceases to be contemporary and that it is contemporary only from the moment of its conception until the moment its creator determines that it is completed.
I regard myself as a contemporary creative artist and therefore not someone just creating contemporary artworks because I am doing what I am doing full time. I am interested in historical art and I would like to possess the knowledge and the skill to reproduce some historical art but this is not my priority or immediate interest. I am expressing my thoughts and feelings through my work balancing between what I am capable and able to do with the available techniques and processes presently available. Therefore on one hand to qualify as a contemporary artist I should make available all what I do to anyone anywhere any time with the technology, and interact with those who wish to interact with me, but I am limited by the means to do this and the willingness to make everything all time open and available because of the belief and the commitment to what should be personal, private and confidential and what can and should be open and public.
Something is art if it is art to me.
Something is not good or bad, brilliant or poor because it is popular or appreciated by only a few. I know if something is good or bad, brilliant or poor and the opinion of others should be significance only to them.
Fashion is for those who wish to be fashionableIndividualist art is art created exclusively by an individual
Collective art is art which is created by more than one individual and that applies to all work where the artist uses the material and labour of others. I regard my myspace site as a separate and a component part of my artwork project and therefore it is a collectively art component, dependent on myspace and anyone who adds comments for example or becomes listed as a friend. The work cannot exist with me or you.
10.30 It is nearly time for cricket and football so there is washing up and washing me, preparing food and will need to think more and re write what I have written.
23.00 I have significantly rewritten what I wrote first thing this morning original has been printed and is part of work development set 2060.
23.30 Washing up of the day has been completed and rubbish ready for putting out in the morning There was coffee twice and one toast (a concession) in the morning. I had a small plate of vegetables just before the match started and then half the stuffed roast pork joint with six or seven slices of roast potato at half time. This evening I had a defrosted prawn salad with olives and more pieces of cucumber than usual with two slices of nutty brown bread and my last can of Pepsi Cola with the intention of buying no more until the weight is below sixteen stone There was one cup of tea and I am about to drink iced water, undesirable before bedtime but better than anything else and I have gone off drinking OJ.(I did not drink the water as I lost the need during further writing and viewing)
At 11.30 Sky was at the Riverside for the first competitive cricket match of new season against the nearest county team of Yorkshire and where extraordinarily Durham had become the team to beat as the holders of the competition which involves ten 50 over innings games played home and away in a mini league and then quarter and semi finals with the final played at Lords in August. I was due to attend the final last year and then my mother went into hospital. I used to attend most days of cricket played around the County and once a year in Northumberland after Durham became part of First class cricket and the annual visited to Darlington, Stockton, Hartlepool, Chester le Street, and Gateshead were always of interest as well as to the beautiful university ground at Durham City before the Riverside Ground also at Chester Le Street was opened and then developed. I also enjoyed visits to various county grounds, at Headingly and Harrogate of Yorkshire, at Lancashire's ground at Manchester City, to Grace Road Leicester and Trent Bridge Nottingham, Warwickshire's ground in Birmingham close to the university where I studied for a year and then to the London area grounds especially the Oval where I visited as a boy and saw the last innings of Sir Donald Bradman and the great Sir Len Hutton whose autobiography he signed for me and Lords where as a Durham member I was able to use the Long Room, and the grounds of Kent at Canterbury and Maidstone, and Sussex at Hove but did I get to Essex, missing out on Cardiff although I have visited the city and passed ground when there was play, and Somerset, Worcestershire, Hampshire, and Derby, I think. The day was bitterly cold, the word freezing was used and the audience. well it could not be called a crowd, was negligible because of the weather, because of the football derby and because it was on the telly. As the first competitive game of this season and as preparatory matches and preparatory work outside had been non existent, the decision was taken in all the matches where play was possible, in four it was not, for the captain who won the coin toss to ask the other side to bat first and this was so with Yorkshire who were without their captain Darren Gough, but under the leadership of Mr Moxon who was instrumental in creating the Durham success but then could not resist the opportunity to join his home county in a similar role midway during the season. There is therefore added rivalry as there would be if Keegan left Newcastle and Keane took over although a better comparison would if Keegan had first gone to Sunderland and then moved to Newcastle. Durham had two Harmison's but no Collingwood and last year's West Indian bowling star has become coach to the English Team. The start was slow and boring and I felt for the brave souls wrapped up in blankets clutching coffee flask.
13.00-15.20 The first Tyne Wear Derby for a couple of years was a challenge. There would have been no problem had Sam Alladyce been in charge but with Kevin back the problem was different. I hoped to enjoy the game and for the result to be a draw. Unfortunately Sunderland quickly lost heart to a brilliant Michael Own headed goal and you felt their fate was sealed when just before half time there was penalty which Owen also converted, but only just.. They tried harder in the second half and had one bullet header from Jones not been saved the outcome might have been different. The Toon will have bragging rights until the next time.
15.20 I rushed out to Tesco in the hope of a Mail on Sunday which contained a Simply Red CD but not expecting there would be any Brit Film DVD's. On the way back I passed a pub where a Sunderland and a Newcastle shirt fan were enjoying a fag in the afternoon sunshine perhaps husband and wife, boy and girl friend but that is Shields. a town divided between the two team, within streets and within houses.
16.00-19.00 At first it looked as if Durham were going to have a good first win as they reached over 200 runs with one good score of 77 and then put the Tykes under the cosh with five wickets for 75 or so runs. It looked as if the game was over, ho, ho, ho, slowly, despite the loss of further wickets Yorkshire held on and then all the Durham substantial advantage was thrown away in one crazy over yielding over 20 runs. All was not lost with the final wicket taken with one ball to go. The winning margin was 5 runs but the overall performance indicated that last year's progress was not a flash in the pan. It got even colder as the evening progressed and quite dark. I could feel that cold sitting in my warm from the memory of occasions when I had been there although admitted I did watch one early match against Scotland from inside the restaurant area, watching first to last ball without ever sitting in the open air.
20.00-22.00 Foyle's War was magnificent as it explored again the impact of the ending of the war with Germany on returning service men and on the community. It recaptured feelings which I remember so well. The scene of the promenade with the beach fenced off with barbed wire, other obstacles and warning signs Danger keep out, was exactly as I remember, as well as the VE day and returning home of the soldier, and the telegram from the one who did not.
00.30-01.30. I went to the internet to see if BBC Eye were showing the TV Baftas and my attention was taken by programme about a young single mother ( alleged) struggling to pay her university student fees) and doing lap dancing which is actually stripping naked for a fee of £15 from the punter but where the girl pays the joint owner £85 a night for the privilege so that makes 10-12 punters to make any profit if taxis and drinks were taken into account I quickly realised this was not a documentary but a clever drama film produced by the Ministry of Information to warn young women away early single parenthood and dipping their toe in the sex industry where with the help of the programme the lass was introduced to someone who said she could earn £900 in a night as an escort and someone else £2000 a week in the porn end of the market. The most interesting and revealing exposure was however the London based fixer who arranged girls to escort celebrities to parties, in this instance the Brits but where she failed miserably on all counts. You knew the evening was to end with disaster when the she was told she did not have hair, make up or clothes suitable and incredulity was stretched when she decided to go home to catch the last train around 11 pm having been contracted to stay until 12.30 and paid up front and of course what she did after that and who with was then her own business. She was clearly after meeting some famous millionaire who would pay her debts and give her the life, including mansion which she stated she longed for. The clue about the nature of this programme is that she was studying to be an actress but found it difficult to find time to learn her lines, but was being given an A grade for performance although if it was not clear if this was from her personal tutor who she was sharing the home with, but was somehow managing to increase her overall debts, including to him and he admitted he could lose his job if the his employers found out which did not seem to worry him given that he was announcing the situation on the telly. The levels of delusion and exploitation were upsetting. Reality usually is. Hopefully I will be able to watch the Bafta later in the Day.
I also wondered about the human beings who in different places and at different times first decided it would be good to draw and paint and tell stories or make objects, or sing or make noises, or move their bodies. What made one human do one thing from another? Was the first impulse emotional? How much thought went into the first actions.
I also wondered about those first human beings who looked up at the falling rain or snow and wondered what it was, or speculated about the force that blew at different speeds and could move the clouds in the sky, and why it became light and became dark, or of that the first individual, perhaps in a cave, alone and afraid who thought about death as well as about life.
Such beings were the first human creatives, the first artists, the first teachers and first spiritual guides. They also had to hunt and fish, find shelter and warmth and know how to defend themselves, their mates, their children and their parents when they aged and could not longer hunt and fish and make shelter for themselves.
At various times in various places a community was formed of sufficient size and organisation that it was possible for individual human beings to contribute to their society as creatives, artists, writers, thinkers and teachers, and such like. It can be argued that the division of labour was necessary for society to progress as it was for each skill to develop techniques and methods, a body of knowledge first based on experience and then on written record, and to develop its own language and then systems for testing the knowledge and the skill, awarding competence, and rewarding exceptional ability. Sometimes I wonder if such a division was a good thing and that that we have lost more than we have gained when we lose the capacity to provide food, provide shelter, provide entertainment and provide for our owns security and those of others close to us. But whether it was good or bad, it has happened and for most people and for the most part it is necessary to adapt and accept change if we are to survive.
The function of those who draw, paint, write, who create objects, create and perform music, dance and drama has and remains varied: for pleasure and entertainment of oneself and others, to celebrate, venerate and pay tribute to the physical environment, the metaphysical, the supernatural and the spiritual, to show appreciation, respect and feeling for one or more others, or question and challenge aspects of the human beings, individually and collectively and over time the activity has been generated to create personal wealth, power and status. The emphasis or priority given by the creators has and will continue to vary and enables those who wish to examine the work of previous generations to learn something of the nature of the society and of the position of creativity within that society.
It appears to me that there have always been those creatives who become recognised, become fashionable, become rewarded for their work while other will be mocked, or ignored or make others angry or afraid, and they and their work is rejected, banished and even destroyed and that this will always be so.
To-day the position has only changed in one significant respect in that we can sit in our modern caves and with comparatively small amounts of trading goods we can experience something of the creations that are known to have existed and are continuing to be created from the commencement of time on planet earth and we can communicate with those who are creating, who are collecting, conserving and curating, who are thinking and teaching, who are learning or just enjoying and experiencing and sharing, and we can communicate anywhere and anytime in the known world, and perhaps presently unknown to us to other beings beyond.
Having expressed my own regret at not being able to hunt and fish, raise animals and grow crop, build my shelter, and suck like I also believe it is a good thing that when an individual human being shows a desire and an aptitude in some activity they are provided with all the help and the knowledge to enable them to satisfy themselves and those others interested in that activity, and that for this we have created teachers and tutors, schools, colleges and universities, and in order to differentiate between levels of activity and ability we devise tests to find out what has been learnt and what individuals can do and that as a consequence assign them roles, and in some instance give them full time or part work in the activity in question.
You do not have to go through these formal processes and structures to engage in the activity or excel at it, unless you live in a society which requires to do so, but in general the formal system of education, training and the management of practice has led to the creation of things we all value and which have stood the test of time.
However as I mentioned recently in relation to something else it is also fact that some creatives are different and special and contribute to society disproportionately to the majority of others, even if those others have also been educated and trained and have become experienced
For my part I came to what I do now and what I think and say about it, differently from those who are presently recognised as the experts in the doing, evaluating, collecting and showing and had I been younger, or wanted to do something different, I would have followed the available routes to learn, to be tested, rated and certificated. I would have done this not because I need to, but because like every mountain, desert, ocean bed, deep forest or glacial wilderness because it is there. I would also like to see more of what there is to see and to experience at first hand instead of through relayed pictures and sounds
I am confident, however, that given my experience of life beforehand I would not have arrived at different conclusions about what I need to do, how I need to do it, what I hope to achieve, or what I think and feel about the work of others.
I am a creative who needs and wants and has the means to create. I also used be someone who set out to intentionally influence, but no longer, for reasons, some private and some which can be made public. I have always had, and I still have the drive and the patience to complete what I am involved with on the basis of what I or others decided should be the desired outcome, or to adapt or significantly change, and even abandon projects according to priorities and circumstances.
It does not matter to me or affect what I think, believe say or do that some individuals create one thing in one way and then spend the rest of their time reproducing the thing in the same way or differently, whether they make no money, sufficient to live on money, or rich money beyond need to continue doing what they want and are able to do, whether they are recognised by the their peers or the rest of the world or not if they give what they do.
I have formed the opinion that art becomes historical the moment it ceases to be contemporary and that it is contemporary only from the moment of its conception until the moment its creator determines that it is completed.
I regard myself as a contemporary creative artist and therefore not someone just creating contemporary artworks because I am doing what I am doing full time. I am interested in historical art and I would like to possess the knowledge and the skill to reproduce some historical art but this is not my priority or immediate interest. I am expressing my thoughts and feelings through my work balancing between what I am capable and able to do with the available techniques and processes presently available. Therefore on one hand to qualify as a contemporary artist I should make available all what I do to anyone anywhere any time with the technology, and interact with those who wish to interact with me, but I am limited by the means to do this and the willingness to make everything all time open and available because of the belief and the commitment to what should be personal, private and confidential and what can and should be open and public.
Something is art if it is art to me.
Something is not good or bad, brilliant or poor because it is popular or appreciated by only a few. I know if something is good or bad, brilliant or poor and the opinion of others should be significance only to them.
Fashion is for those who wish to be fashionableIndividualist art is art created exclusively by an individual
Collective art is art which is created by more than one individual and that applies to all work where the artist uses the material and labour of others. I regard my myspace site as a separate and a component part of my artwork project and therefore it is a collectively art component, dependent on myspace and anyone who adds comments for example or becomes listed as a friend. The work cannot exist with me or you.
10.30 It is nearly time for cricket and football so there is washing up and washing me, preparing food and will need to think more and re write what I have written.
23.00 I have significantly rewritten what I wrote first thing this morning original has been printed and is part of work development set 2060.
23.30 Washing up of the day has been completed and rubbish ready for putting out in the morning There was coffee twice and one toast (a concession) in the morning. I had a small plate of vegetables just before the match started and then half the stuffed roast pork joint with six or seven slices of roast potato at half time. This evening I had a defrosted prawn salad with olives and more pieces of cucumber than usual with two slices of nutty brown bread and my last can of Pepsi Cola with the intention of buying no more until the weight is below sixteen stone There was one cup of tea and I am about to drink iced water, undesirable before bedtime but better than anything else and I have gone off drinking OJ.(I did not drink the water as I lost the need during further writing and viewing)
At 11.30 Sky was at the Riverside for the first competitive cricket match of new season against the nearest county team of Yorkshire and where extraordinarily Durham had become the team to beat as the holders of the competition which involves ten 50 over innings games played home and away in a mini league and then quarter and semi finals with the final played at Lords in August. I was due to attend the final last year and then my mother went into hospital. I used to attend most days of cricket played around the County and once a year in Northumberland after Durham became part of First class cricket and the annual visited to Darlington, Stockton, Hartlepool, Chester le Street, and Gateshead were always of interest as well as to the beautiful university ground at Durham City before the Riverside Ground also at Chester Le Street was opened and then developed. I also enjoyed visits to various county grounds, at Headingly and Harrogate of Yorkshire, at Lancashire's ground at Manchester City, to Grace Road Leicester and Trent Bridge Nottingham, Warwickshire's ground in Birmingham close to the university where I studied for a year and then to the London area grounds especially the Oval where I visited as a boy and saw the last innings of Sir Donald Bradman and the great Sir Len Hutton whose autobiography he signed for me and Lords where as a Durham member I was able to use the Long Room, and the grounds of Kent at Canterbury and Maidstone, and Sussex at Hove but did I get to Essex, missing out on Cardiff although I have visited the city and passed ground when there was play, and Somerset, Worcestershire, Hampshire, and Derby, I think. The day was bitterly cold, the word freezing was used and the audience. well it could not be called a crowd, was negligible because of the weather, because of the football derby and because it was on the telly. As the first competitive game of this season and as preparatory matches and preparatory work outside had been non existent, the decision was taken in all the matches where play was possible, in four it was not, for the captain who won the coin toss to ask the other side to bat first and this was so with Yorkshire who were without their captain Darren Gough, but under the leadership of Mr Moxon who was instrumental in creating the Durham success but then could not resist the opportunity to join his home county in a similar role midway during the season. There is therefore added rivalry as there would be if Keegan left Newcastle and Keane took over although a better comparison would if Keegan had first gone to Sunderland and then moved to Newcastle. Durham had two Harmison's but no Collingwood and last year's West Indian bowling star has become coach to the English Team. The start was slow and boring and I felt for the brave souls wrapped up in blankets clutching coffee flask.
13.00-15.20 The first Tyne Wear Derby for a couple of years was a challenge. There would have been no problem had Sam Alladyce been in charge but with Kevin back the problem was different. I hoped to enjoy the game and for the result to be a draw. Unfortunately Sunderland quickly lost heart to a brilliant Michael Own headed goal and you felt their fate was sealed when just before half time there was penalty which Owen also converted, but only just.. They tried harder in the second half and had one bullet header from Jones not been saved the outcome might have been different. The Toon will have bragging rights until the next time.
15.20 I rushed out to Tesco in the hope of a Mail on Sunday which contained a Simply Red CD but not expecting there would be any Brit Film DVD's. On the way back I passed a pub where a Sunderland and a Newcastle shirt fan were enjoying a fag in the afternoon sunshine perhaps husband and wife, boy and girl friend but that is Shields. a town divided between the two team, within streets and within houses.
16.00-19.00 At first it looked as if Durham were going to have a good first win as they reached over 200 runs with one good score of 77 and then put the Tykes under the cosh with five wickets for 75 or so runs. It looked as if the game was over, ho, ho, ho, slowly, despite the loss of further wickets Yorkshire held on and then all the Durham substantial advantage was thrown away in one crazy over yielding over 20 runs. All was not lost with the final wicket taken with one ball to go. The winning margin was 5 runs but the overall performance indicated that last year's progress was not a flash in the pan. It got even colder as the evening progressed and quite dark. I could feel that cold sitting in my warm from the memory of occasions when I had been there although admitted I did watch one early match against Scotland from inside the restaurant area, watching first to last ball without ever sitting in the open air.
20.00-22.00 Foyle's War was magnificent as it explored again the impact of the ending of the war with Germany on returning service men and on the community. It recaptured feelings which I remember so well. The scene of the promenade with the beach fenced off with barbed wire, other obstacles and warning signs Danger keep out, was exactly as I remember, as well as the VE day and returning home of the soldier, and the telegram from the one who did not.
00.30-01.30. I went to the internet to see if BBC Eye were showing the TV Baftas and my attention was taken by programme about a young single mother ( alleged) struggling to pay her university student fees) and doing lap dancing which is actually stripping naked for a fee of £15 from the punter but where the girl pays the joint owner £85 a night for the privilege so that makes 10-12 punters to make any profit if taxis and drinks were taken into account I quickly realised this was not a documentary but a clever drama film produced by the Ministry of Information to warn young women away early single parenthood and dipping their toe in the sex industry where with the help of the programme the lass was introduced to someone who said she could earn £900 in a night as an escort and someone else £2000 a week in the porn end of the market. The most interesting and revealing exposure was however the London based fixer who arranged girls to escort celebrities to parties, in this instance the Brits but where she failed miserably on all counts. You knew the evening was to end with disaster when the she was told she did not have hair, make up or clothes suitable and incredulity was stretched when she decided to go home to catch the last train around 11 pm having been contracted to stay until 12.30 and paid up front and of course what she did after that and who with was then her own business. She was clearly after meeting some famous millionaire who would pay her debts and give her the life, including mansion which she stated she longed for. The clue about the nature of this programme is that she was studying to be an actress but found it difficult to find time to learn her lines, but was being given an A grade for performance although if it was not clear if this was from her personal tutor who she was sharing the home with, but was somehow managing to increase her overall debts, including to him and he admitted he could lose his job if the his employers found out which did not seem to worry him given that he was announcing the situation on the telly. The levels of delusion and exploitation were upsetting. Reality usually is. Hopefully I will be able to watch the Bafta later in the Day.
